#88 - How Resilient Are You? Test Yourself and Grow!

We become more resilient as we age. It seems quite intuitive, although not all research confirms that. For example Daniel Kahneman points out the illusion of skills and validity as a drawback of experience. Over time we learn how to deal with different situations and can fall into a trap of overconfidence, which can compromise our ability to assess reality.

The very cornerstone of resilience is having a strong sense of purpose. If you think that your life has a meaning you have a strong sense of purpose. This is one of our pillars, so I can only confirm that it comes up again and again in all literature on both personal and organisational resilience.

Some of the points raised later in the scale are very closely linked to the notion of strong purpose:

• Perseverance and determination are core characteristics of resilience. It seems to be just a consequence of a sense of purpose. "When your journey gets difficult, as it usually does, your sense of purpose will pull you forward and help you to overcome the obstacles".

• Learning from your disappointment, focus on your successes, and move forward. Nassin Taleb phrase it in Antifragile: “A loser is not someone who fails, but someone who fails to learn.”

• I see an obstacle as a challenge to overcome is almost identical to the previous one.

• Living true to your values - A strong sense of purpose has to be based on strong values. Those two are linked so close that they are in my opinion inseparable.

Resilience requires you to depend on yourself to find a way through anything. It is in a way an essence of improvisation. Ability to use resource at hand to achieve the desired outcome.

Smile, and you will begin to relax; laugh, and your stress and anxiety will lessen. Sense of humour comes out as an important characteristic of resilience in other sources. Check on our blog the series: Let's Have Some Resilient Fun.

We can continue to improve our resilience through our lives. It is in line with my thinking, where I strongly believe that resilience is a set of capabilities that can be learnt and developed. It is linked to the idea that we become more resilient as we age. I would like to stress however, that it is not automatic. It requires informed and focused practice and learning.

...but it is possible to become less resilient over time. If we understand resilience as a dynamic set of capabilities it can move both direction increase or deteriorate.

Our response to adversity can build resilience but you can build it also through informed practice and develop it further to prepare for changes.

Having a good friend can make a difference in how resilient you are. Strong social networks are key for both individual and group resilience. it is the characteristic stressed by all resilience experts I know.

Grit is just one part of resilience. To have "grit" means you don't quit or give up, which is important in resilience but is only part of the concept, which is broader and focused not only on hardship but other capabilities that help to manage change and continue to develop. Sometime it is better to give up on something and find another way to fulfill your purpose.

Less stress in your life is not associated with greater resilience. Resilient people do not necessarily are those who are experiencing less stress. They do however have capabilities to respond to a stressful situations in a successful way.

Finally, Dr Gail Wagnild suggests cultivating the following habits to strengthen your resilience:

• Practice mind-calming and restorative activities.

• Challenge yourself to keep learning and experiencing new things.

• Learn to view the future with optimism and hope.

• Avoid extreme responses and replace negative thoughts with realistic ones.

• Never give up on the pursuit of important goals.

• Make choices that are consistent with your deeply-held values

• Have a sense of purpose as you go about your life.